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And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone;
I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
Genesis 2:18

Biblical Principles of Dating from admin's blog

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Biblical Principles of Dating Video


So the time has come and you are ready to start dating, to find your significant other. While dating should not be about ticking off on the checklist, there are a few principles that can help you get the most out of this experience.

God always has the best plan for our lives (Jeremiah 29:11), so as with dating. The purpose of dating is to identify a spouse, with whom you can build a Christian marriage.

 

Undivided Devotion to the Lord

 

God’s will must lie at the foundation of your dating practices and everything else you do (Matt 6:33). In Mark 12:29-31,” Jesus answered him, “The first of all the commandments is: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment.  And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”

The scripture says first you must “Love the Lord”, then only after can you love another. Before you can fulfil, be responsible for, and love another person, you must ensure that your personal relationship with God is established.  Is your sight and heart set on God? Do you trust Him? Are you seeking his kingdom? If your heart says “yes” to all three, you are one step closer to beginning your search for your significant other.

 

Love Yourself

 

Although the bible does not include a specific command to love yourself. Mark 12:31 says, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself”,Indicates that a reasonable degree of self-love and self-respect is normal and beneficial. In Ephesians 5:29 Paul put it, “ For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.” So the crux of it all, how do you love yourself? The answer is to understand the depth of God’s love, mercy, forgiveness and grace. He demonstrated this love in the most powerful way possible when he sacrificed Jesus on the cross to die for our sins. John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”When we comprehend God’s love, when we deeply know he loves us, then you are experiencing self-love. Ephesians 2:4-5, “But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions — it is by grace you have been saved.”

 

Be Equally Yoked

 

Marrying an unbeliever is a common theme throughout the bible; each unequally yoked relationship resulted in negative consequences for their lives and families. Samson (the strongest man, Judges 14), King Jehoshaphat (Trusted in the Lord, 2 Chronicles 17-20), David (the best hearted man, 2 Samuel 6) and Solomon (the wisest man, 1 Kings 11) just to name a few. The bible clearly states in 2 Corinthians 6:14, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. God is expressing a consistent concern that Christians should not be overly influenced by non-Christians. A dating relationship between a Christian and a non-Christian could negatively influence a Christian’s morals, convictions and priorities. If you are deciding to date someone outside of your fellowship find out: what are their convictions about salvation, Lordship, purity, and purpose.

 

Date with the intent of Marriage

 

Dating without the intent of getting married is like going to the grocery store with no money. You either leave unsatisfied or you take something that isn’t yours. -Jefferson Bethke

 

Whether beginning with online dating or dating in person, making your intentions clear is one of the most important things you can do for a healthy relationship. Casual or purposeless dating has no benefit for Christians. We are intentional beings. We are designed to know why we do stuff and where we are going. Dating is no different. Dating with the intent of marriage means dating with a purpose, dating someone with the values and goals you have for a future significant other, based on biblical foundations.

It says in 1 Corinthians 7: 8-9, “Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. “

 

Remain Pure

 

God’s standard for sexual purity is not a suggestion, but a command, and it is very clear. In 1 Corinthians 6:18 it says, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body”. If need be, literally run out on your date... and explain later. But to avoid all this melodrama, from the beginning lay it out on the table. Set the boundaries; let each other know your beliefs on biblical sexuality.

So where does this leave all of those who have already messed up? For couples who have slept together or have other regrets, it’s important to know that you can always put your relationship on the right path. Proverbs 24:16 reads,”For through a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again.” The first step in getting back up again after a fall is repenting.

1 Thessalonians 4:3 says, “This is God’s will for you, that you avoid sexual immorality.”Pursue absolute purity when dating.

 

Seek Advice

 

In Proverbs 15:22 it says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed.” It is wise and beneficial for you to seek advice/counselling in matters of dating. Sometimes emotions can cloud our judgement about someone, seek advice to find objectivity. Seek advice from your pastor or counselling staff, you know what they say, there is no better advice than that of a bible based church.

 

Use these Christian dating principles as rules to live by when dating and always seek discernment and ask God if a specific person is in His will for your destiny. If there is no peace in your heart, then that relationship is not from God. Ask God to reveal characteristics that are pleasing to him as well as to reveal the red flags. The biblical principles to dating may seem tough, buts its reward is sweet and brings happiness. It is now up to you to follow these principles so you can reap the blessings.


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